OD 12.30.2002 [5:51 p.m.]

taking over the world!

BahmloDrom: remember that movie? "You've Got Mail"?

BahmloDrom: tom hanks' guy had, like, an aunt who was nine

BahmloDrom: and a brother who was five

ElementalShiva: vaguely. i saw like...

ElementalShiva: half of it

ElementalShiva: on a plane

ElementalShiva: BORING

BahmloDrom: pishaw.

ElementalShiva: SAPFEST

BahmloDrom: *grins* I LIKE sap.

BahmloDrom: THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

BahmloDrom: Sap is good.

ElementalShiva: i know *LOL*

BahmloDrom: You're a GUY. You wouldn't understand.

ElementalShiva: which is why i must, at all costs, avoid the sap movies you recommend.

BahmloDrom: There were no killings. *grin*

ElementalShiva: LOL

BahmloDrom: Hey, I recommended Moulin Rouge--and that was sappy!

ElementalShiva: a movie isn't a movie w/o killings!

ElementalShiva: well.

ElementalShiva: there were killings. sorta.

BahmloDrom: And so was Crouching Tiger, which I also recommended. (...I think.)

BahmloDrom: Pishaw.

ElementalShiva: and that wasn't sappy. she DIED

BahmloDrom: And Braveheart was sappy!

ElementalShiva: WAS NOT!!!!!!

ElementalShiva: OMFG

BahmloDrom: And, what? Death doesn't automatically change sap to non-sap!

BahmloDrom: (see also: city of angels.)

ElementalShiva: braveheart's wallace was the ultimate machoguy

ElementalShiva: city of angels is DIFFERENT

ElementalShiva: i mean, wallace?

ElementalShiva: WHUPPED ASS all over the place

BahmloDrom: *grins* That movie was so funny. I still 'member watching it with my brother. She's doing that arm thing eyes closed rollerblading down a hill.... and he's all snickering, "And along comes a TRUCK." (Then, along comes a truck - BAM). Bro's eyes went like: STARE.

ElementalShiva: and then nailed the princess of the country whose ass he was whupping!

BahmloDrom: and, so?

ElementalShiva: (what? *LMAO*)

BahmloDrom: grrrrr.

ElementalShiva: that's like. the ULTIMATE.

ElementalShiva: (shocked silence)

BahmloDrom: what? no, i thought you had more to say.

BahmloDrom: *grins*

ElementalShiva: no! *LOL*

ElementalShiva: it's the ULTIMATE. that's it.

BahmloDrom: (sheesh, I almost typed (groins) )

ElementalShiva: i mean!

BahmloDrom: the ULTIMATE what?

ElementalShiva: (groins? *LMAO*)

ElementalShiva: the ULTIMATE manliness.

ElementalShiva: take their land, their gold, AND their women. woohoo!

BahmloDrom: Dude, you so do not help your gender rise in mye yes. *grins*

ElementalShiva: *cracks up*

ElementalShiva: argh! i swear to god. V's never on when i wanna play w/ her.

BahmloDrom: *LOL* I'm sorry Damon, but V does not exist solely for your pleasure.

ElementalShiva: *LMAO*

ElementalShiva: bah!!

ElementalShiva: well. hmmph.

ElementalShiva: *plots to conquer some unsuspecting country's land, gold and women*

BahmloDrom: Yeah, I just bet you do.

BahmloDrom: After all, the Wyrm is your "you" brain-child. *smirk*

ElementalShiva: france being the logical target.

ElementalShiva: *dies laughing*

BahmloDrom: Why? 'Cos the women are slutty?

ElementalShiva: the Wyrm isn't after land, cold and women, though. poor fool.

BahmloDrom: cold and women? *grins*

ElementalShiva: and - no! the women are hot (and yes, slutty), and the men can't fight.

ElementalShiva: GOLD

ElementalShiva: goddammit.

BahmloDrom: sure they can! *defends*

ElementalShiva: that was a weird typo *LMAO*

BahmloDrom: the men will incinerate you with their hotness.

ElementalShiva: and they CAN'T.

ElementalShiva: *dies*

ElementalShiva: sorry.

BahmloDrom: or their gayness.

ElementalShiva: i don't swing that way, thus immune.

ElementalShiva: okay...the gayness might work.

ElementalShiva: if i'm retching the whole time, i can't fight.

BahmloDrom: it doesn't matter which way you swing, little poppet!

ElementalShiva: POPPET?

BahmloDrom: and then they beat you to death.

ElementalShiva: *bites*

BahmloDrom: yes, poppet.

BahmloDrom: OW. screw you!

ElementalShiva: with what?

ElementalShiva: a frog-leg?

BahmloDrom: heh, heh--you don't want to know.

ElementalShiva: dear god, save me from the wrath of the frog legs.

BahmloDrom: No! wait! bottles of WINE!

ElementalShiva: no, that won't work, jess. they're not BIG enough.

BahmloDrom: and the chicks'll use stilletto heels.

ElementalShiva: and - okay, the wine might hurt *LOL*

ElementalShiva: the chicks'll defend me!

BahmloDrom: UGLY ones.

BahmloDrom: what!

ElementalShiva: i'll be a prized commodity, seeing as how i'd be the only non-gay man in their borders.

ElementalShiva: the ugly ones can go fight amongst their men

ElementalShiva: the hot ones will form a protective harem-circle around me

BahmloDrom: hey, you won't be the ONLY non-gay man.

ElementalShiva: and blind all opposition with their beauty!

ElementalShiva: yeah i will.

BahmloDrom: no you don't!

ElementalShiva: under my tyrannical rule, all non-gay men will be put to the sword!

BahmloDrom: but you wouldn't rule yet!

ElementalShiva: i will soo enough!

ElementalShiva: soon!

BahmloDrom: *snickers* "soo" enough eh?

ElementalShiva: or, well, no. all non-gay men would be sent out to conquer another unsuspecting nation.

ElementalShiva: what should i attack next?

BahmloDrom: hmph.

BahmloDrom: uhm. england!

ElementalShiva: dude

ElementalShiva: i was just gonna say that *LOL*

ElementalShiva: frigid bitches! woohoo!

ElementalShiva: frigid bitches in britches? *dies laughing*

BahmloDrom: and then i'll take jude law in the after math. *grins*

ElementalShiva: oh, are you gonna be my ally? *grins*

BahmloDrom: okay. i'm just going to stare, while you laugh at that joke. *smirk*

ElementalShiva: *LMAO*

BahmloDrom: no, i'm just going to take jude law in the after math.

BahmloDrom: then i will denounce you.

ElementalShiva: bah.

ElementalShiva: i'll have jude law killed.

ElementalShiva: or at least sent into the army for the NEXT conquest.

ElementalShiva: i'll leave all those redheads in ireland alone, though.

ElementalShiva: too shrill.

BahmloDrom: WHAT?

ElementalShiva: *LMAO*

BahmloDrom: oooooo. then you'll die!

ElementalShiva: okay, fine!

ElementalShiva: i'll send him to you as a peace offering.

BahmloDrom: ...okay. *mollified*

BahmloDrom: and he has to be INTACT. *eyes narrow*

BahmloDrom signed off at 3:06:20 PM.

BahmloDrom signed on at 3:09:09 PM.

ElementalShiva: yay!

BahmloDrom: heh. 'twas a bad boot, 'twas.

ElementalShiva: *LOL*

ElementalShiva: poor jess.

ElementalShiva: and yeah, yeah, he'll be INTACT *smirk*

BahmloDrom: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeexcellent. *grins*

BahmloDrom: and then!

BahmloDrom: i'll denounce you!

BahmloDrom: *muaha*

ElementalShiva: fine. you'll be executed along with the rest of the traitor rebels *severe*

BahmloDrom: nah.

BahmloDrom: i'll throw angelina jolie in your path.

BahmloDrom: and while you are distracted by her lips of power i'll have some other lackey kill you.

BahmloDrom: i'll get jack the ripper from the past.

BahmloDrom: and make him think you're a whore. *grins*

ElementalShiva: what! that wouldn't work!

ElementalShiva: angelina wouldn't distract me, anyway.

ElementalShiva: i'd have legions and legions of hot frenchwomen and frigid englishwomen.

ElementalShiva: all carrying my bastards, too, while i'm off conquering the next country!

ElementalShiva: (i think i'll go for norway this time. nab me some snowbunnies)

ElementalShiva: norwegian men used to be tough, though. they used to be vikings. but then again, now they just make furniture. i'll distract them with an ikea catalogue.

BahmloDrom: ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww/

ElementalShiva: what?

BahmloDrom: legions and legions of damon bastards is a SCARY thought!

BahmloDrom: and GROSS too!

ElementalShiva: *LMAO*

ElementalShiva: why?

BahmloDrom: and *LMAO*

BahmloDrom: "what? this CRAP gets sold?"

BahmloDrom: *bomb, bomb*

BahmloDrom: "it is an outrage!"

ElementalShiva: they'd all be big tough guys like me.

*just...DYING*

ElementalShiva: wtf is bomb bomb? *LMAO*

ElementalShiva: hey, that gives me an idea. i won't conquer 'em. i'll use them as my personal attack force. show them Ikea catalogues and then point them at the nearest enemy country. "They sell that crap!"

BahmloDrom: who? the bastards? *stare*

ElementalShiva: no!!

BahmloDrom: and, bomb bomb is bomb, and then abother bomb!

ElementalShiva: the norwegians.

BahmloDrom: much like rikku's attack in final fantasy ten. *smirk*

BahmloDrom: and, ack! i gave you an idea!

ElementalShiva: i'll turn their righteous fury at crap furniture on my enemies!

ElementalShiva: gonna go conquer the Ukraine instead

ElementalShiva: they have snowbunnies too.